Horror Stories From The Technology Trenches

Delving into the realm of technology is much like descending into the abyss – a dark, often frightening place that a select group of individuals are skilled enough to traverse out of. Thankfully for Vertical Technologies (VT), we have a staff of techie masterminds waiting to rappel down any and every IT nook and cranny. These cloud explorers can scale infrastructures, pioneer innovative app developments and even fix your printer. From molehill to Mount Everest, our technology nerds are pioneering the latest and greatest in scalable solutions.

We weren’t always the established company you know and love today, though. We had to humbly start somewhere, and that somewhere has given us some pretty hysterical stories to share with our clients these days. If you think your IT problems are bad, check out these horror stories from the trenches…

man at desk with laptop help sign


She was one of the first individuals that we were serving as a newly formed information technologies startup. This particular woman – let’s call her Beth – had incredibly long nails. Because of Beth’s nails, she typed with a pencil. Her speed was pretty incredible, but strange to watch nonetheless. She jabbed the power button on her desktop every morning with the eraser end of a pencil. Every few months, she would break the power switch. I was told explicitly not to correct the behavior, but simply fix the problem and move on… so I did… and it was weird.

long nails typing


Within the same office building, Susan’s desktop wouldn’t start and she couldn’t figure out why. We rushed to the scene only to find about 40 dollars worth of quarters sitting on top of her power board. Why, you ask? Well, Susan was in her late 60s. When we got to her office, she said, “I put my quarter in and tried to power it on like normal, but it’s just not starting.” The poor woman was treating her Dell like a gumball machine.



Bob had a severe distrust of online data storage centers. He was a lawyer who kept all of his hard-coded documents, put them into cardboard boxes, stacked them and shipped them to his own warehouse building. That building was decked out with a keypad entry, high walls, motion sensors and barbed wire. Bob was under the impression that this method of sensitive data storage was “more secure than the cloud.” Encrypted data on a cloud hosted site versus cardboard boxes inside a glass building… safety of this sensitive information was definitely at stake for Bob, but his distrust of technology ultimately reigned supreme.

filing old office boxes


From paranoid people to those with electronic PTSD, Vertical Technologies has had to deal some of the most interesting tech situations under the sun. One gentleman was using his CD ROM drive as a coffee cup holder and another was using his mouse as a nutcracker. Verbiage has historically been an issue i.e. “No, it’s not a word document, it’s the thingy I type on,” and I can’t tell you how many times I’ve talked someone through downloading Adobe Reader. I’m sure your office has some kooks too, but we are here for your organization – no matter how odd the IT situation. Starting at the small business level, Vertical Technologies will be there to help with your everyday IT horrors. Check out our Managed Service Desk for a free, personalized quote.


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